Sunday, February 13, 2011

Gaga and Other Important News

I feel like I'm living in a time warp. Got a text the other day from bff, D- "Don't be a drag just be a queen. Luv Gaga's new song."

New Gaga song? I immediately google this. Agree- luv this new song. Also, notice that Gaga has had about 17 new looks since I've been sucked into the time warp. Man Alive! It's not like this is Mars- people here speak English.... very nice people here, who listen to country and the Bible on the radio. Don't get me wrong- the Bible is a great book.... I love it! But it's not music, it's not let's-get-this-party-started jimmy jamming.

So, please send information and updates about the world... important things like date of the Gaga video debut or album release.

Saturday, February 12, 2011

thehateweshare.com


Going through some clutter in my home office.. came across this list in between pages of notes I took at a conference about 2 years ago. I think it was about a website idea.. ?? I'm not sure because I'm really much of a doodler of random thinker, I normally pay attention in lectures... and why did I think I had time to create a website??
so I was either really bored, or really frustrated/__ fill in the blank... let me take you through the list.






  • sleeping in pee (when would this ever be an issue?)
  • stepping in dog poo, especially other dogs' poo (I must have stepped in poo sometime that week, such a drag to wash off- and for some reason, poo from someone you don't know and love- dog or otherwise- makes the ick factor infinitely worse)
  • drama queen with no entertainment value (don't know what happened here b/c I consider the usual DQ variety HEE-Larious)
  • saddlebags (mine, other people's don't bother me- makes it hard to wear pants, skirts, and all other clothes... and also be naked, if necessary)
  • Pinkberry (secretly love it, but mad that I didn't think of it first)
  • Taryn Rose (faker who fake makes ugly shoes- also wish I thought of it first)
  • toilet water on butt (this is a given- toilet must have flushed on my butt that day)
  • inferiority complex and audience who plays into it (???)
These are more like "dislikes". There isn't really anything to hate, except really bad things like hate crimes- I do hate those, but doesn't everybody?

I wonder what other people dislike... maybe that's why I thought of the site. But what a tragic thing to come together for... hate. That was a terrible idea!

Wednesday, February 9, 2011

Here we go again....

So, the driveway is all white again, after nice Neighbor worked so hard to shovel it clean. I wonder when it'll melt?







But look at that kitty litter- it really works! It's the only area on the driveway without snow. Neighbor was going to sweep it away- thank goodness it's still there.







No mailman today. I don't blame him..... Little dog won't go outside onto the snow. Big dog tried today, but slipped, fell.... so just ran back inside without peeing. Why would the mailman risk that kind of adventure?

Friday, February 4, 2011

Driveway!

Look at the driveway! My Neighbor did this... not me (see below).... not that I'll be driving on it anytime soon.... not after I saw those cars collided in front of me. Let's not tell my parents about the colliding cars, though..... If you know my parents, you will not tell them, for my sake. They are only staying calm at the moment because they know I am at home, going nowhere. They think I will be hiring someone to drive me to work on Monday.... maybe, maybe not... but if they think maybe not, one of them may throw a clot and have a stroke (no joke). Everything is fine here.
P.S. as I got off the phone with them, mom says "it was hot today, we had to turn on air conditioner- oh sorry, Noona!"

Snow Day #4: Update

Dogs start barking wildly, yes my lazy dogs.... What, guys? Someone is in the driveway....My super nice Neighbor is shoveling my driveway for me! I can't even believe it.... I run outside with a thermus of green tea and handful of Kind bars- I don't know what else to do, so nice! He says something like, "I thought you might try to just drive over all this snow (yes, that was exactly my plan...) but that'll just create a pack of ice underneath (oh whoops).... So, I'm gonna need to get this off for you (oh, my hero)."

I think, maybe I can go into the office for the afternoon? Then, like an SNL skit, dead ahead of us about 1/8 mile of my house, Neighbor says, "oh look- another accident." Another?? "Yeah, there have been a quite a few on this road." This- the road that I need to take to get to the Expressway to get to the office. I'm back inside the house.

Snow up and down

I know you can't tell from this photo, but it's snowing. So, not only is the snow on the ground NOT melting, but more snow is coming from the sky! Man alive... They kept saying, "Oh- it rarely snows here, only some seasons... it's the ice you have to worry about, really... and on those days, you just stay home...." What is happening here? Snow is my deal-breaker. Snow and rain. Snow should be on mountains where you can drive to it and board on it, then leave it...
So, I ask my super sweet boss yesterday what to do about all the snow on my driveway- Do you think I can just drive over that? I have a capable car... Should I sprinkle that stuff over the snow to help it melt, then drive over it?? She kinda goes... uhh.. (something like), You really should shovel the snow down a bit then put the salt on/ drive over it....(I kinda stopped listening after she said shovel...) I tell her I didn't even think to get a shovel. She says, well, no problem- just use something to move some of the snow out of the way, like a bucket (I feel so dumb- I don't think I have a bucket, but I can't tell her this because she is so nice to me and never talks to me like I'm dumb). OMG. I panic- like a piece of wood? I will have to find one. My hands? I am going to die of being too cold. It's like 2 degrees today (ok- it's 24, but it feels like 2). I decide to stay home.
Then I see that the mail man finally came! Yay! I feel guilty. Poor mailman.

Thursday, February 3, 2011

Snow Day #3

Getting ready to go out for a pee break. Day 3 at home. Snow still everywhere.... not going anywhere, not melting... just staying as snow.

Wednesday, February 2, 2011

Snow Day#2

Wall of snow still around the house....










but now can see some of the concrete of the driveway! (but.... I think it's because my nice Neighbor H sprinkled some gravel, salt or whatever to melt the snow because it's just the immediate area from my door to the car.... so I don't slip and fall, I think. He's so thoughtful!)






However, notice how there is no other sight of anymore of the driveway or road between my carport and the houses ACROSS the street.

Lazy days




My dogs, apparently, are not the most active. Little dog spent most of the day in bed. Finally lured him out with treats and toys.






Lasted a good few minutes. Then it was time to rest again.... time to rest up for the big outting!







Coat on, booties, now.... Out to pee! Again, little dog was like... No way, Jose. Big dog went just right out the door, for just a sec, then right back in. Waaaay too cold for poo out there- that takes too much time, I guess. These are the things I worry about in my State of Emergency- will my dog explode because she hasn't poo-poo'd for 2 days because she doesn't like snow?




Tuesday, February 1, 2011

State of Emergency


I just got a text from a gal at work who said that OK called a State of Emergency yesterday. No wonder! No wonder- the hysteria now makes sense. This is my first snow State of Emergency- very exciting. I had to go out and take a look-see.... and I look-see'd a "wall o' snow" around the front of the house.


Then I also saw my Neighbor H shoveling his driveway! He's like my dad's age... Go inside, H! We are in a State of Emergency!










White Winter

Car in carport surrounded by snow. 30-50 mph winds blowing snow all over.... I wonder how I'm supposed to get out of the driveway. Are there people for hire to clear this? Am I supposed to shoo the snow away somehow?









Big dog's first time in real snow! All suited up in coat and booties... but she didn't get far, just right outside the glass door... pee, then right back in!

Getting Ready




Here we are... getting ready for the big snow storm coming into OKC. People have been telling me that snow is coming so all I can think is, how will the dogs go out to pee?

Little dog does not love his snow booties... and they kept falling off. So, mission aborted- he can just pee inside (on the pad).

Then, I was warned about "freezing rain" that could cause powerage. Again, what the heck is "freezing" rain? So many new words to learn! They say it's not rain, not sleet, not snow- but it's rain that freezes BEFORE it gets close to the ground.... I guess.... very high risk of electrical line damage. Ohhh nooo.

So, one of the many super nice OK folks gave me list of things to pick up from Lowe's and Target from my way home from work last night-
  • "rock salt" (another new OK word- stuff that melts the ice on your driveway)
  • flashlight and batteries
  • water
  • food
  • candles
  • lighter/ matches














Now, I am ready! (I left the rest of the water and rock salt in the car- too heavy.)